I'm 45 today

Today is my birthday and I'm not where I thought I would be. I haven't met the goals that I had set in my 20's.

I'm still dealing with 5 year olds and getting kids on the school bus on time.

I'm still not the cook I thought I would be by now. I thought my days of mac and cheese would be over by 45.

I still haven't found a funky 'style' to wear.

I still haven't finished writing my book.

I have about 1/2 the energy I had 10 years ago.

Friends are getting old age diseases.

My ass is about 3 inches lower that it used to be...but then so are my other cheeks.

When I tan I get little red dots that are still there in the fall.

My older relatives are dying off.

My smile lines don't go away when I quit smiling.

There are foods I can't eat before I go to bed.

Staying up late and not drinking still gives me the hangover.

I see people in charge and realize that I would card them for cigarettes.

I have less tolerance for stupid people.

I finally realize that all government is little people with big ideals who end up lost and crooked.

I'm looking forward to menopause so my monthly is over with.

I'm either halfway through my life if I have my grandmother's genes or a couple years from death if I don't. This birthday sucks.